作者：创想外语研发团队
出版社：中国纺织出版社
格式: AZW3, DOCX, EPUB, MOBI, PDF, TXT
经典英文枕边书：每天读点英文笑话试读：
前言
很多时候，我们总是感觉外国人比较幽默，特别是美国人，即便是在非常正式的场合，也能发现幽默笑话的影子。英语幽默笑话是英语文化中的精华之一，不过有时候由于中西方文化的差异，或者一词多义的现象，有些英语幽默笑话在英语文化中能让人笑掉大牙，而在中文中我们却觉得找不到笑点，所以我们一定要仔细体会英语笑话中的幽默，理解英语笑话的真正内涵。
与一般的幽默笑话书只是简单地罗列堆砌一些笑话不同，本书把一些经典的英语幽默笑话按场景分类，给人一种耳目一新的感觉。本书的内容和特色如下：
一、按生活场景分类
本书打破常规的罗列笑话方式，按场景把笑话分为十章，分别为基本交流、校园、家庭、职场、恋爱婚姻、购物、交通、饮食、医疗与健康和态度情感。分类细致，且和我们的日常工作生活息息相关，让我们感觉工作生活中的幽默无处不在。
二、内容讲解细致
本书每篇幽默笑话基本上都由英语笑话连篇、中文翻译接龙、幽默词汇点睛、幽默语法分析、谈笑生辉口语、笑话文化链接等六部分组成。每一篇幽默笑话都有中文译文，还有点睛词汇，方便读者学习和领会其中的笑点。幽默语法分析是针对每篇幽默笑话中的长句、难句以及语法点进行的剖析，让读者更好地领会其中的含义和笑话的精髓。
三、笑话和口语学习两不误
本书每篇幽默笑话都配有谈笑生辉口语，这些口语以AB式小对话的形式出现，非常生活化，也符合该笑话的主题。是不可多得的口语学习材料，让读者在幽默的同时还能提升口语会话能力，达到一举两得的效果。
四、笑话文化链接
基本上每篇笑话都有笑话文化链接，读者在学习幽默笑话的同时，了解其在英语国家的文化背景，能弥补跨文化交际中笑话笑点不足的缺憾，从而能帮助读者更好地理解其中的含义。
五、切合笑话和口语内容的图片
本书每篇笑话都针对笑话内容和谈笑生辉口语的内容配备了栩栩如生的实物图片，让读者在看到图片的同时也能体会笑话中的幽默，达到图文合一的效果。
总之，这不仅是一本幽默笑话书，也是一本口语学习书。希望每一位读者在笑过之余，在英语口语方面也能上一个大台阶。
最后，希望本书的每一位读者都能好好利用本书，全面提高自己的英语水平。由于编者的水平有限，书中难免存在疏漏或不妥之处，恳请广大读者批评指正，以便我们再版时进一步改进，在此对每一位读者表示衷心感谢。编者2018年4月第一章基本交流1 自我介绍What’s Your Name? 你叫什么名字？英语笑话连篇
A very strict officer was talking to some new soldiers whom he had to train. He had never seen them before, so he began:My name is Stone, and I’m even harder than stone, so do what I tell you or there’ll be trouble. Don’t try any tricks with me, and then we’ll get on well together.
Then he went to each soldier one after another and asked him his name. “Speak loudly so that everyone can hear you clearly,” he said,“and don’t forget to call me ‘sir’.”
Each soldier told him his name, unitl he came to the last one. This man remained silent, and so Captain Stone shouted at him, “When I ask you a question, answer it! I’ll ask you again: What’s your name,soldier?”
The soldier was very unhappy, but at last he replied. My name is Stonebreaker, sir. He said nervously.中文翻译接龙
有一位很严厉的军官在对一群交由他训练的新兵训话。他以前从没见过这群新兵，于是他开始自我介绍：我的名字叫Stone（石头），事实上，我甚至比石头更强硬。这就是我为什么要告诉你们我名字的原因。不要试图对我玩什么花招，这样我们就能很好相处了。
接着他开始走到每个士兵前面问他们的名字。“说大声点，让每个人都能听清楚，”他说，“另外，不要忘记称呼我为‘长官’。”
每个士兵都对他说了自己的名字。他走到最后一个士兵面前时，这个士兵保持着沉默。于是Stone上尉对他喊叫，“当我问你问题的时候，要回答！我再问一遍，你的名字，士兵？”
那个新兵很不高兴，但最后他回答了。我的名字是Stonebreaker（碎石机），长官。他紧张地说。幽默词汇点睛
strict [strɪkt] adj. 严厉的，严格的
soldier [ˈsəʊldʒə(r)] n. 士兵，军人
trouble [ˈtrʌbl] n. 困难，苦恼
trick [trɪk] n. 诡计，花招
loudly [ˈlaʊdli] adv. 高声地，响亮地remain [rɪˈmeɪn] v. 仍然是，保持不变shout at 大声说，喊
nervously [ˈnɜːvəsli] adv. 紧张地，胆怯地幽默语法分析
1. A very strict officer was talking to some new soldiers whom he had to
train. 有一位很严厉的军官在对一群交由他训练的新兵训话。
解析 这是一个由whom引导的定语从句。whom指代前文的new soldiers，在从句中充当train的宾语。例如：He is the man whom I saw yesterday. 他就是我昨天见的那个人。
2. Speak loudly so that everyone can hear you clearly. 说大声点，让每
个人都能听清楚。
解析 这是一个由so that引导的目的状语从句。从句部分是用以补充说明主句中谓语动词发生的目的。例如：He must get up early so that he can catch the first bus. 他必须早起，以便能赶上第一辆公共汽车。谈笑生辉口语
A May I have your name,please?
B I’m May.
A 能告诉我你的名字吗？
B 我叫梅。
A What’s your name, please?
B My name is Betty.
A 请问你叫什么名字？
B 我叫贝蒂。
A I’d like to make a self-introduction. I’m William Johnson.B It’s nice to meet you, William.
A 我想做一下自我介绍。我叫威廉·约翰逊。
B 很高兴见到你，威廉。
★self-introduction [ˌself-ˌɪntrəˈdʌkʃn] n. 自我介绍
A My name is Linda, a friend of Jack.
B I’ve heard so much about you.
A 我叫琳达，是杰克的一个朋友。
B 久仰!
A It’s nice to meet you, Sue. Please call me Linda.B Linda, glad to meet you too.
A 很高兴见到你，苏。请叫我琳达吧。
B 琳达，也很高兴认识你。笑话文化链接2 天气Weather Forecast 天气预报英语笑话连篇
A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day, an old Indian went up to the director and said, “Tomorrow will be rain.” The next day it rained.
A week later, the Indian went
up to the director and said, “Tomorrow will be storm.” The next day there was a hailstorm.
“This Indian is incredible!” said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather.
However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian didn’t show up for two weeks. Finally the director sent for him.“I have to shoot a big scene tomorrow,” said the director, “and I’m depending on you. What will the weather be like?”
The Indian shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know,” he said. “The radio has broken.”中文翻译接龙
一个电影摄制组在沙漠深处工作。一天，一个印度老人告诉导演说：“明天有雨。”第二天果然下雨了。
一周后，这个印度人又来告诉导演说，“明天有暴风雨。”果然，第二天下了冰雹。“这印度人真神！”导演说。他让秘书雇佣这个印度人来预报天气。
可是，几次预报成功后，这位印度老人有两周都没露面了。最后导演派人去叫他。“我明天要拍一个很大的场景，”导演说，“我就靠你了。明天天气如何？”
印度人耸了耸肩，说：“我不知道，收音机坏了。”幽默词汇点睛
crew [kruː] n. 队，组
location [ləʊˈkeɪʃən] n. 位置，场所；（电影的）外景拍摄地
desert [ˈdezət] n. 沙漠，荒漠，荒原
director [dɪˈrektə(r)] n. 导演
hailstorm [ˈheɪlstɔːm] n. 冰雹
incredible [ɪnˈkredəbl] adj. 难以置信的，不可思议的
secretary [ˈsekrətrɪ] n. 秘书，书记
predict [prɪˈdɪkt] v. 预报，预告prediction [prɪˈdɪkʃən] n. 预言，预报show up 出现，露面
shoot [ʃuːt] n. 拍摄
scene [siːn] n. 片段，场面，场景
shrug [ʃrʌg] v. 耸（肩）幽默语法分析
One day, an old Indian went up to the director and said, “Tomorrow will
be rain.” 一天，一个印度老人告诉导演说：“明天有雨。”
解析 在本篇笑话中，要注意直接引语。讲述别人的原话，并把它放在引号里，这叫直接引语。直接引语用来直接引述别人的
话语，一般说来具有以下五个特点：
①引用的话之前用“,”；
②引用的话结束后，需用“.”“?”“!”等标点符号；
③被引用的话是原话，不做任何改动；
④被引用的话放在引号内；
⑤引出直接引语的引述词常有say（说道），ask（问道），shout（喊道），cry（喊道），laugh（大笑道）等。例如：
He said, “I am going to see her this afternoon.” 他说：“我今天下午要去看望她。”“You are wrong,” Tom said. “你错了。”汤姆说。谈笑生辉口语
A Have you listened to the weather forecast?
B Yes, it is sunny today.
A 你听天气预报了吗？
B 听了，今天天气晴朗。
★forecast [ˈfɔːkɑːst] n.&v. 预报，预测
A Is it going to rain today?
B I heard it might rain.
A 今天会下雨吗？
B 我听说今天可能下雨。
A How’s the weather tomorrow?
B The weather forecast says it will rain tomorrow.A 明天天气怎么样？
B 天气预报说明天有雨。
A Nice day, isn’t it?
B Yes, it’s incredible. We haven’t had sunshine like this in months!A 天气真好，不是吗？
B 是啊，好得出奇。我们已经几个月都没见到这样的阳光啦！
★sunshine [ˈsʌnʃaɪn] n. 阳光
A It is boiling today, isn’t it?
B Yes, it’s very hot and stuffy.
A 今天的天气热得要命，是不是？B 是的，今天天气很闷热。
★boiling [ˈbɔɪlɪŋ] adj. 炎热的
★stuffy [ˈstʌfɪ] adj. 通风不良的，闷人的笑话文化链接3 气候The Climate Of New Zealand 新西兰的气候英语笑话连篇
Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand?
Matthew: Very cold, sir.
Teacher: Wrong.
Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen!中文翻译接龙
老师：马修，新西兰的气候怎么样？
马修：先生，那里的天气很冷。
老师：错了。
马修：可是，先生！从那儿运来的猪肉都冻得硬邦邦的。幽默词汇点睛谈笑生辉口语
A It’s freezing outside.
B Yeah, this weather is awful.
A 外面特别冷。
B 是啊，这天气太糟了。
★awful [ˈɔːfl] adj. 很坏的，糟透的
A It’s a pretty rainy fall this year.
B I wish it wasn’t. I like dry autumns.
A 今年秋天的雨会特别多。
B 我希望不是这样，我喜欢干爽的秋天。A What’s the temperature today?
B It’s about 6 degrees centigrade today.
A 今天气温是几度？
B 今天大约6摄氏度。
★temperature [ˈtemprətʃə(r)] n. 气温
★degree [dɪˈgriː] n. 度，度数
★centigrade [ˈsentɪgreɪd] n. 摄氏度笑话文化链接4 时间Talking Clock 会说话的钟英语笑话连篇
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den.
“What is the big brass gong and hammer for?” One of his friends asked.
“That is the talking clock,” the man replied.
“How does it work?” the friends asked.
“Watch,” the man said and proceeded to give the gong an earshattering pound with the hammer.
Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall,“Knock it off, you idiot! It’s two o’clock in the morning!”中文翻译接龙
一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓，甚是得意。“那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的？”他的一个朋友问他。“那是一个会说话的钟，”这人回答。“这钟怎么工作的？”朋友问。“看着！”那人走上前拿起铜锣和锤子，拼命地敲了一下，声音震耳欲聋。
突然，他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫，“别敲了，你这白痴！现在是凌晨两点钟了！”幽默词汇点睛
proudly [ˈpraʊdli] adv. 骄傲地，傲慢地show off 炫耀，卖弄
apartment [əˈpɑːtmənt] n. 一套公寓房间，房间
den [den] n. 私室
brass [brɑːs] n. 铜管乐器
gong [gɒŋ] n. 锣
hammer [ˈhæmə(r)] n. 锤子
proceed [prəˈsiːd] v. 前进，行进
ear-shattering [ɪə(r)ˈʃætərɪŋ] adj. 震耳欲聋的scream [skriːm] v. 尖声喊叫，喊出knock it off 别吵了，别争了
idiot [ˈɪdɪət] n. 蠢人，笨蛋，傻瓜谈笑生辉口语
A Hi, Jane. What’s the time now?
B It’s 8:30 by my watch.
A 嗨，简。现在几点了？
B 我的手表是8∶30。
A Excuse me, do you have the time?
B Yes, it is 3 o’clock.
A 打扰一下，你知道现在几点了吗？
B 知道，现在是3点了。
A Does your watch keep good time?
B Not really. It’s about four minutes fast.
A 你的表准吗？
B 事实上不准。快了4分钟。
A Do you know what time it is?
B My watch says it’s a little past 4. But it tends to be slow.A 你知道现在是几点了吗？
B 我手表上是四点多一点，不过手表慢了。笑话文化链接第二章校园1 学校课程The Formula for Water 水的分子式英语笑话连篇
Teacher: What is the chemical formula for water?
Blonde: HIJKLMNO!!
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Blonde: Yesterday you said it’s H to O!中文翻译接龙
老师：水的化学式是什么？
布朗德：HIJKLMNO！！
老师：你在说什么？
布朗德：昨天你不是说H 到 O吗？幽默词汇点睛谈笑生辉口语
A Oh, man, I don’t think I’m going to like this class.
B Well, you can always drop it.
A 噢，天哪，我觉得我不会喜欢这门课的。
B 好吧，你随时可以放弃这门课。
★drop [drɑp] v. 停止，中断
A What classes are you taking next semester?
B I’m going to take chemistry and mathematics.A 下学期你计划学哪些课程？
B 我打算学化学和数学。
★chemistry [ˈkemɪstrɪ] n. 化学
★mathematics [ˏmæθəˈmætɪks] n. 数学
A How many credits do we need to get the degree?B 200 credits.
A 我们要修满多少学分才能拿到学位？
B 200学分。
★credit [ˈkredɪt] n. 学分
A Why did you choose this course?
B Because I will get lots of practice in speaking, and also in writing.
A 你为什么选这门课程？
B 因为我会有很多练习会话和写作的机会。
A Can I choose a specialization such as 19th century English literature?
B Yes, you can choose it when you are in the second year.
A 我能选择像19 世纪英国文学这样的课程作为专业课吗？
B 可以，你大二的时候可以选择这门课。
★specialization [ˌspeʃəlaɪˈzeɪʃən] n. 专业，专门
★literature [ˈlɪtrətʃə(r)] n. 文学，文学作品
A Is there a wide variety of classes offered each semester?B Classes are limited to freshmen, but
after the first year you may take more advanced courses.
A 每学期都会有许多课程供选择吗？B 对新生开放的课程是有限的，但一年之后你就可以选择更多的高级课程了。
★semester [sɪˈmestə(r)] n. 学期
★freshmen ['freʃmən] n. 新生，大学一年级学生★advanced course 高级课程笑话文化链接2 获得学位Perseverance is a Virtue 坚持是一种美德英语笑话连篇
Many years after receiving my graduate degree, I returned to the State University of New York at Binghamton as a faculty member. One day in a crowded elevator, someone
remarked on its ineff i ciency. I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.
When the door finally opened, I felt a compassionate pat on my back, and turned to see an elderly nun smiling at me. “You’ll get that degree, dear,” she whispered. “Perseverance is a virtue.”中文翻译接龙
获取研究生学位多年以后，我回到位于宾翰顿的纽约州立大学当教员。一天，电梯里很拥挤，有人抱怨电梯效率太低。我说自我在那里当学生起，20年来电梯一直没有换过。
最后当电梯门打开时，我感到有人在我的背上同情地拍了一下，回过头来我看到一位年长的修女正在朝我微笑。“你会拿到学位的，亲爱的，”她低声说道，“坚持是一种美德。”幽默词汇点睛
faculty [ˈfækltɪ] n. 全体教员
elevator [ˈelɪveɪtə(r)] n. 电梯
remark [rɪˈmɑːk] v. 谈论
inefficiency [ˌɪnɪ'fɪʃnsɪ] n. 无效率，无能
compassionate [kəmˈpæʃənɪt] adj. 有同情心的，怜悯的
perseverance [ˌpəːsɪˈvɪərəns] n. 坚持
virtue [ˈvɜːtʃuː] n. 美德幽默语法分析
I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student. 我说自我在那里当学生起，20年来电梯一直没有换过。
解析 这是一个由since引导的时间状语从句。since表示自某一时间点以来，其引导的从句的谓语动词可以是延续性的动词，又可以是瞬间性动词。一般情况下，从句谓语动词用一般过去时，而主句的谓语动词用现在完成时。但在It is+时间+since从句的句型中，主句多用一般现在时。例如：
Great changes have taken place since you left this city. 自从你离开这座城市以来，发生了很多变化。
It is five months since I left Beijing. 我离开北京有五个月了。谈笑生辉口语
A Congratulations on graduating!
B Thank you very much.
A 祝贺你毕业了！
B 非常感谢。
★graduate [ˈgrædʒuət] v. 毕业
A What a nice feeling to get my degree!
B Yeah, and I can’t believe tomorrow is our last day of college.A 要拿到学位了感觉真好。
B 是啊，我都不敢相信明天就是我们在大学的最后一天了。A Do you want to attend my convocation?
B Yes, I do. What time?
A 你想参加我的毕业典礼吗？
B 当然想。什么时候？
★convocation [ˏkɔnvəˈkeɪʃn] n. 集会
A Jim, you’re graduating this year, right?
B Yes. I’ve been searching for a job to start my career.
A 你是今年毕业，是吧，吉姆？
B 是啊。我一直在找工作，开启我的职业生涯。
★career [kəˈrɪə(r)] n. 职业
A Finally! I’m done with this semester!
B Woohoo! It’s been quite a ride.
A 终于完了！我终于过完这个学期！
B 啊！真像一段旅行。笑话文化链接
读书笔记3 老师The new teacher 新老师英语笑话连篇
George comes from school on the first of September.
“George, how did you like your new teacher?” asked his mother.
“I didn’t like her, mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too…”中文翻译接龙
9月1日，乔治放学回到家里。“乔治，你们的新老师怎么样？”妈妈问。“我不喜欢她，妈妈，因为她说3加3等于6，可后来又说2加4也等于6……”幽默语法分析
I didn’t like her, mother, because she said that three and three were six and
then she said that two and four were six too…我不喜欢她，妈妈，因为她说3加3等于6，可后来又说2加4也等于6……
解析 首先分析句子的主干，这是一个由because 引导的原因状语从句，在原因状语从句中又有两个由that引导的宾语从句，分别作said的宾语。谈笑生辉口语
A Do the children like their new teacher?
B Yes. They say the new teacher is very nice.
A 孩子们喜欢他们的新老师吗？
B 喜欢。他们说新老师很好。
A Have you ever had Professor Green?Is he good?
B Yes. He is strict but very good.
A 你和格林教授打过交道吗？他怎么样？
B 嗯，他很严格，不过人挺好。
A I really like how he teaches.
B Me too.
A 我真的很喜欢他讲课。
B 我也是。笑话文化链接4 课堂问答Who was the first man 谁是第一个男人英语笑话连篇
A teacher said to her class, “Who was the first man?”
“George Washington,” a little boy shouted promptly.
“How do you make out that George Washington was the first man?” asked the teacher, smiling indulgently.
“Because,”said the little boy, “he was first in war, first in peace,and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”
But at this point a larger boy held up his hand.
“Well,” said the teacher to him, “who do you think was the first man?”
“I don’t know what his name was,” said the larger boy, “but I know it wasn’t George Washington, ma’am,because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him.”中文翻译接龙
一位老师问班上的学生：“谁是第一个男人？”“乔治·华盛顿。”一个小男孩当即叫道。“你怎么知道乔治·华盛顿是第一个男人呢？”老师微笑着问道。
小男孩说：“因为他是战时第一，和时第一，国人心中第一。”
这时一个大点儿的男孩举起手来。“那么，”老师对他说，“你认为谁是第一个男人呢？”“我不知道他的名字，”大点儿的男孩说，“但我知道不是乔治·华盛顿，老师。因为历史书上说，乔治·华盛顿娶了一个寡妇，所以在他前面肯定还有一个男人。”幽默词汇点睛
promptly [ˈprɒmptli] adv. 实时地make out 理解，了解；写出
indulgently [ɪnˈdʌldʒəntli] adv. 溺爱地谈笑生辉口语
A How many credits do we need to get the degree?
B According to the syllabus, it will be 150 credits.
A 我们要修满多少学分才能拿到学位？
B 根据教学大纲来说，是150学分。
★credit [ˈkredɪt] n. 学分
★according to 根据，按照
★syllabus [ˈsɪləbəs] n. 教学大纲
A Hi, Professor, I would like to ask you a few questions about the department’s curriculum.
B Of course. What would you like to know?
A 嗨，教授，我想向您咨询几个关于系里课程方面的问题。
B 好的，你想知道些什么？★department [dɪˈpɑːtmənt] n. 系★curriculum [kəˈrɪkjuləm] n. 课程笑话文化链接
读书笔记
试读结束[说明：试读内容隐藏了图片]