舌尖上的智慧：美国名校毕业演说(第6辑)(txt+pdf+epub+mobi电子书下载)

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舌尖上的智慧：美国名校毕业演说(第6辑)试读：

分享你的成功——霍华德·舒尔茨在亚利桑那州立大学2017年毕业典礼上的演讲

霍华德·舒尔茨1953年出生于纽约布鲁克林一个贫穷的犹太人家庭。舒尔茨经常在演讲中提及他的童年经历：在他七岁那年，父亲因一次工伤摔断了脚踝而失业，那个年代工人受了工伤不但没有赔偿、遣散费和健康保险，还会因受伤而被开除。困苦的童年生活一直是舒尔茨心中的伤疤。

后来，舒尔茨的命运开始发生转折。他获得了北密歇根大学的体育奖学金，得以进入大学学习。大学毕业后，他的第一份工作是施乐公司的销售员。从施乐公司离职后，他来到一家销售咖啡用具的公司工作。1981年，他拜访公司的客户——专门销售咖啡豆的星巴克咖啡公司，因受其吸引，一年后便加入其中，并成为运营和销售总监。后因理念分歧，舒尔茨于1985年离开星巴克，筹资建立了自己理想中的咖啡店，起名“Il Giornale”。两年后，星巴克公司将其零售业务出售给舒尔茨，“Il Giornale”也正式更名为“Starbucks”（星巴克）。此后，星巴克很快扩张到全美，1992年正式在纳斯达克上市。现在，星巴克在全球70多个国家（或地区）拥有26000多家门店。

因受童年不愉快经历的影响，创始人舒尔茨十分关注其雇员的利益与发展。星巴克向包括兼职人员在内的所有员工提供全面的医疗保险，并向员工发放“咖啡豆股票”，即每位员工都可以持有星巴克的股份。因为在舒尔茨看来，“成功只有被大家分享时才是最美妙的”。2018年6月28日，舒尔茨正式从公司董事会执行主席职位上退休，只担任荣誉主席一职。

2017年5月，舒尔茨受邀在亚利桑那州立大学2017年毕业典礼上发表演讲。在演讲中，舒尔茨鼓励毕业生们勇于追求梦想，并告诫他们在逐梦过程中要忠于自己的价值观和初心。他通过自己的人生经历告诉毕业生们，成功要靠努力赚取，但成功只有被大家分享时才是最美妙的。Speech演讲音频视频

Thank you, President Crow, for that generous introduction. I really appreciate our friendship and everything we are doing together. Thank you to the Arizona Board of Regents, faculty and special guests.

Congratulations to the graduating Class of 2017 and those who are here to support you on this very, very special day, and to our 330 Starbucks College Achievement Plan graduates. So proud of you, who have benefited from the Starbucks and ASU partnership. I am incredibly proud to be your partner. Congratulations to all of you!

I would like to begin my time with you today by sharing a personal story.

Last year, Starbucks Coffee Company opened our first store in South Africa in Johannesburg. I had never been to South Africa before, did not know what to expect, certainly could not be prepared for the level of poverty and what I saw in the townships throughout the city. We opened two stores and lines were out the door in anticipation of Starbucks coming to the market. But before we opened the stores, I [1][2]gathered the 50 young people who would grace the green apron and put on the Starbucks apron and represent the company. I sat with them for a few hours and wanted to hear each one of their personal stories.

As they were sharing their stories with me, despite their poverty, [3]their plight in life, there was so much joy and gratitude in their hearts. But what I learned was two things. One, all 50 of these young people had never had a job before. They were all unemployed for their entire life. And you should see the self-esteem and the sense of security as they were getting ready for their first job. But the second lesson was as they were going around the room and talking to me about their story, I kept hearing an African word I had never heard before, a word that Nelson Mandela used all the time. The word is “ubuntu”, U-B-U-N-T-U, ubuntu. And finally, I got up the courage and I asked, “What does this word mean that you keep using?” And they couldn't wait to share it with me.

And in unison, they said, “Howard, ‘ubuntu’ means I am because of you. I am because of you.”

As I have the honor to speak with you today, I ask you to keep that story in mind because everything I'm going to share with you today is through the lens of “ubuntu.”[4]

I grew up in Brooklyn, New York, in public housing—the projects, as it was called back then. My parents were both high school dropouts, and they could barely afford $96 a month rent in our two-bedroom apartment for my brother, my sister and my parents.

However, from my earliest of memories, my mother instilled in me her belief in the American Dream and the promise of America, that a good education and hard work will open the doors to a better life. And that provides me with an important lesson to share with you all today—that your station in life does not define you, and the promise of America—that is for all of us.

When I was 7 years old, I had a defining moment in my life. I came home from school one day and saw my father laid on a couch with a cast from his hip to his ankle. He had a series of terrible blue collar jobs as a high school dropout, army vet, but this particular job he had in 1960 was probably the worst.

He was a truck driver delivering and picking up cloth diapers [5]before the invention of Pampers. He fell on a sheet of ice in March of 1960, and in March of 1960, if you were a blue collar, uneducated worker, you were dismissed if you had an accident. No workman's [6]compensation, no severance, and no health insurance. And I saw the fracturing of the American Dream and I saw my parents go through hopelessness and despair at the age of 7. And those scars, that shame, that is with me even today.

As a young boy, I could have never imagined that I would one day build a company of my own, let alone a company that would have more than 26,000 stores in 75 countries and employ more than 300,000 people. Thank you.

But from day one, I really wanted to build the kind of company my father never got a chance to work for, a company that honors and respects the dignity of work and the dignity of all men and all women. And that is why we became the first company in all of America to provide comprehensive health insurance 30 years ahead of the [7]Affordable Care Act, as well as ownership in the form of stock [8]options for all of our employees, including part-time people, because it is my firm belief that success in business and in life is best when it's shared.

Starbucks Coffee Company went public in 1992. And from 1992 to 2006, we were on a magical carpet ride in which everything we did turned to gold. But in 2007, the music stopped. We had lost sight of our shared purpose and our guiding principles, in which growth and success began to cover up mistakes and a disease set into Starbucks. That disease? Hubris. We lost our way, and believe it or not, we almost lost the entire company.[9]

During this cataclysmic period, I was reminded what it means to love something and the responsibility that goes with it, as well as an understanding that leadership and moral courage is not a passive act.

My partners and I took it personally, and we transformed the [10]entire company. We galvanized the entire organization around our core values and servant leadership. Every business, every organization, even every family must be true to its values and reason for being. Our core purpose and reason for being then and now has always been to achieve the fragile balance between profit and humanity.

Today the equity of the Starbucks brand has never been stronger and our track record of creating shareholder value and social impact [11]over the last 25 years has virtually been unparalleled.

We have built one of the most respected and recognized brands in the world, with the view that today the rules of engagement for business and business leaders have changed, that we must do more for our people and the communities we serve, and most importantly, that not every business decision is an economic one, and that success is not an entitlement. It has to be earned and earned every day through the lens of humility.

Only in America can a poor kid from public housing have the privilege and the honor to be the commencement speaker at the [12]largest and most innovative university in the country.

I stand before you as living proof of the American Dream, joining many of your parents, your professors and generations of graduates before you. But today, you may question the strength of that Dream and the promise of America. That's fair.

My generation has not made it easy for you. Our political leaders on both sides of the aisle have not acted with enough courage, nor honesty, in addressing the long-term challenges we face. They have been more focused on fighting with each other than walking in the [13]shoes of the American people. And vitriol and self-interest rule the day in Washington. Despite all that, when I look to the future, I am extremely optimistic, especially when I look out and see you, because the future is not up to them, not up to Washington—it's up to you.

This milestone in your life may come with some anxiety about what tomorrow holds and you may have questions that only time can answer. But as a young man, who once sat nervously at his own commencement, I encourage you to always trust yourself and to be mindful of these three enduring questions: How will you respect your parents and honor your family? How will you share your success and serve others with dignity? And how will you lead with humility and demonstrate moral courage?

You are leaving this campus as the best-prepared generation in the history of our country. You each possess entrepreneurial spirit, the passion, and the commitment to create the future you deserve. However, don't stop there. Try not to rely only on what you have learned in the classroom. Summon your compassion, your curiosity, your empathy toward others and your commitment to service. Give more than you receive, and I promise you it will come back to you in ways you can't possibly imagine.

Each of you is here today because of someone else, a parent, a sibling, a teacher, a neighbor, a mentor, someone who had faith and confidence in you, like my mother had in me, and nurtured your dreams.

As you leave here today, take a moment to think of those who have come before you, who have helped you along the way, who are at your side today. If they are here, embrace them and thank them for the gift of education and for the support and the love that they have given you.

Your generation can bring people together like no other. You can innovate, create, and lead. Your generation will transform our economy and create millions of new jobs. You will develop cleaner energy. You will make it, so racism only exists in history books. Yes, you will. You will be the generation that teaches the world that we are at our best when we recognize, respect, and celebrate our diversity. You can and you will make your mark on our country and our shared humanity. Dream big, and then dream bigger, a more innovative dream, a more inclusive dream.

All of you will preserve and enhance the promise of America, the promise that propelled me out of public housing, the promise that will propel you forward, regardless of the color of your skin, your religion, your gender, your sexual orientation, or your station in life. Please remember that.

ASU is because of you. You are because of ASU. We are because of each other. Ubuntu! Ubuntu! Ubuntu! Yes! Say it with me! Ubuntu! Ubuntu! Ubuntu! Ubuntu! Ubuntu!

Go forward and continue to make your parents and your family proud. God bless you and thank you and congratulations to the Class of 2017! Thank you! Ubuntu! Thank you!

谢谢克罗校长的热情介绍，真心感激咱们的友谊和一起做的一切。感谢亚利桑那校董事会、教职工以及嘉宾们。

祝贺2017届毕业生和在这个非常、非常特殊的日子里到场支持你们的人。祝贺加入“星巴克大学成就计划”的330名毕业生。为从星巴克和亚利桑那州立大学伙伴关系中获益的你们感到自豪。我很自豪能成为你们的合作伙伴。祝贺在座的所有人！

今天，我想从分享自己的一个故事开始讲起。

去年，星巴克咖啡公司在南非开了第一家店，地点在约翰内斯堡。我之前从未去过南非，不知道会遇到什么样的情况，当然不可能有心理准备面对那样的贫穷以及在城里黑人居住区的所见所闻。我们开了两家门店，队伍都排到了门外，人们期待星巴克的到来。但是在开店之前，我召集起50名将为星巴克的绿围裙增色的年轻人，他们将戴上绿围裙，代表星巴克。我和他们坐了几小时，想听一听他们各自的故事。

听着他们的故事，我发现他们虽然生活贫困，却满怀许多快乐与感激。但我了解到两点。第一，这50个年轻人之前从未工作过，他们的人生一直处于失业状态。诸位可以领会到当他们在为第一份工作做准备时获得的自尊与安全感。第二，在他们绕着房间和我分享自己的故事时，我总是听到一个此前从未听过的非洲词，这个词纳尔逊·曼德拉也总是使用。它就是“乌班图”，U-B-U-N-T-U。最终，我鼓起勇气问道：“你们一直说的这个词是什么意思？”他们迫不及待地和我分享答案。

他们异口同声地说：“霍华德，‘乌班图’的意思是，我之存在，因为有你。我之存在，因为有你。”

既然今天有幸能给你们演讲，我希望你们记住这个故事，因为今天我要和你们分享的一切都与“乌班图”有关。

我在纽约布鲁克林的公租房——那时叫做“项目房”——里长大。我的父母都是高中就辍学了，弟弟、妹妹、爸爸、妈妈，我们一家五口挤在两居室的公寓里，父母还是几乎付不起每月96美金的房租。

但是，自记事起，我的母亲就给我灌输她深信不疑的“美国梦”和美国承诺，那就是良好的教育、辛勤的劳动可以开启通往更好生活的大门。由此今天我分享给在座的所有人这重要的一课——你在生活中的地位不能定义你，美国承诺适用于我们所有人。

七岁那年，我经历了人生中具有决定意义的时刻。那天我从学校回到家，看见父亲躺在沙发上，从臀部到脚踝打着石膏。父亲高中都没读完，是一名退役老兵，他干过一系列艰苦的蓝领工作，但是1960年他干的这份特殊工作可能是最糟糕的一个。

他是卡车司机，运送和回收布尿片，那时还没有帮宝适。1960年3月，他在冰上滑倒了。在1960年3月，你如果是一个没受过教育的蓝领，发生事故是要被开除的，没有工人补偿金，没有遣散费，也没有健康保险。七岁的我看到了“美国梦”的崩塌，看到了父母经历的绝望。那些伤痕、那份耻辱一直伴随着我，直至今天。

身为一个小男孩儿，我从没有想过有朝一日我将建立自己的公司，更别提是一家在75个国家（或地区）拥有2万6千多个门店，雇有30多万员工的公司。谢谢你们。

但是从第一天起，我就真的很想创立我父亲永远也没有机会在里面工作的那种公司：尊崇工作尊严，尊崇所有男女员工尊严的公司。因此我们成为全美第一家提供完整健康保险的公司，早于《平价医疗法案》30年。星巴克也是第一家允许所有员工，包括兼职员工，以股票期权的形式享有公司所有权的公司，因为我坚信，无论是商业上还是生活上，成功只有被分享时才是最好的。

星巴克咖啡公司于1992年上市。从1992年到2006年，我们一直坐在魔毯上，做什么都会盈利。但是2007年，好运停止了。我们忘记了共同的目标和纲领，增长和成功掩藏了错误，一种疾病侵袭了星巴克。这种疾病就是骄傲自大。我们迷失了方向，不论你信不信，我们几乎失去了整个公司。

这次大动乱期间，我意识到爱和随爱而来的责任意味着什么，也理解了领导团队和践行道义不能消极被动。

我和我的合伙人们将责任归咎于自己，并全面整改了公司。我们围绕核心价值观和服务领导力激励了整个组织。每个企业、每个组织甚至每个家庭都必须忠诚于它的价值观和存在的初心。无论是当时还是现在，我们的核心目标和初心都是取得利润和人性间那脆弱的平衡。

如今，星巴克品牌的股权空前壮大。我们过去25年里创造股东价值和社会影响力的记录也是无人能及的。

我们打造了世界上最受尊重和认可的品牌之一。我们认为，今天商业和商业领袖们的规则已然改变，我们必须为我们的员工、为我们服务的群体付出更多。最重要的是，不是所有商业决定都是经济方面的，成功不是理所应当的权利。成功需要自己赚取，需要日复一日以谦卑的姿态赚取。

只有在美国，一个在公租房里长大的穷困男孩儿才能有这样的荣幸，能够站在全国最大、最富创新力的大学的毕业典礼台上演讲。

此刻站在你们面前，我就是“美国梦”活生生的例子，这样的例子还包括你们的父母、教授和前辈毕业生中的许多人。但是今天，你们也许会质疑“美国梦”的力量和美国承诺。这情有可原。

我们这代人未能为你们铺平道路。我们左右两派的政治领导人没有拿出足够的勇气和诚意处理我们所面临的长期挑战。他们把更多的精力集中于互相撕战，而不是站在美国人民的角度解决问题。刻薄和自私在华盛顿大行其道。尽管如此，我仍然极度乐观地憧憬未来，尤其当我看向外面，看到你们的时候，因为未来不是他们决定的，不是华盛顿决定的——未来取决于你们。

这一刻是你们人生中的里程碑，或许伴着对明天的焦虑而来。你们或许心存疑问，而只有时间才能给出答案。但作为一个也曾年轻过，曾紧张不安地坐在自己毕业典礼上的人，我鼓励你们要始终相信自己，要不断问自己这三个问题：如何尊重父母，光耀门楣？如何分享成功，并不失尊严地服务他人？如何戒骄戒躁地领导团队，践行道义？

你们是我们国家有史以来准备最充分的一代。如今你们将离开校园，你们每个人都拥有事业心、热情和创造属于你们自己未来的决心。但是，不要就此止步。不要仅仅依赖课堂上学来的知识。拿出你们的恻隐之心、好奇心、对他人的同理心以及服务他人的决心。给予要大于所得。我向你们保证，你们将会有意想不到的回报。

你们每个人都因为某个人今天才能坐在这里。这个人可能是父亲或母亲，可能是兄弟姐妹、老师、邻居、导师，他（她）信任你、相信你，就像我母亲对我。这个人滋养了你的梦想。

今天离开之前，花一会儿工夫想一想那些站在你们身前的人，那些一路帮助你的人，那些此刻陪伴在你身边的人。如果他们在这儿，拥抱他们，感谢他们，谢谢他们赐予你教育这份礼物，谢谢他们给予你的支持与关爱。

你们这代人比任何一代都有能力凝聚人心。你们能够创新、创造和领导他人。你们这代人将让经济焕然一新，创造出数以百万计的新工作岗位。你们将开发出更清洁的能源。你们能让种族主义只存在于史书里。是的，你们能行。你们这一代人将告诉世界，当我们承认、尊重和赞颂我们的多样性时，我们进入了全盛时代。你们有能力并且也将会影响我们的国家和全人类，留下浓墨重彩的一笔。梦要做大一点儿，然后再大一点儿，这个梦要更加新颖、更加包容。

你们都会坚守和提升美国承诺。这份承诺驱使我走出公租房，这份承诺也将驱使你们前进，不论肤色、宗教、性别、性取向或地位。请记住这一点。

亚大因你而存在，你因亚大而存在。我们因为彼此而存在。乌班图！乌班图！乌班图！是的！跟我一起呐喊！乌班图！乌班图！乌班图！乌班图！乌班图！

一往直前吧，继续让你们的父母、家人因你们而自豪。上帝保佑你们。谢谢你们，祝贺2017届毕业生！谢谢！乌班图！谢谢！扫码加入新东方英语听口拔高群每日推送听力口语学习素材提高听口能力保证有料有趣Quotes语录

It is my firm belief that success in business and in life is best when it's shared.

我坚信，无论是商业上还是生活上，成功只有被分享时才是最好的。

Every business, every organization, even every family must be true to its values and reason for being. Our core purpose and reason for being then and now has always been to achieve the fragile balance between profit and humanity.

每个企业、每个组织甚至每个家庭都必须忠诚于它的价值观和存在的初心。无论是当时还是现在，我们的核心目标和初心都是取得利润和人性间那脆弱的平衡。

Today the rules of engagement for business and business leaders have changed, that we must do more for our people and the communities we serve, and most importantly, that not every business decision is an economic one, and that success is not an entitlement. It has to be earned and earned every day through the lens of humility.

今天商业和商业领袖们的规则已然改变，我们必须为我们的员工、为我们服务的群体付出更多。最重要的是，不是所有商业决定都是经济方面的，成功不是理所应当的权利。成功需要自己赚取，需要日复一日以谦卑的姿态赚取。

Try not to rely only on what you have learned in the classroom. Summon your compassion, your curiosity, your empathy toward others and your commitment to service. Give more than you receive, and I promise you, it will come back to you in ways you can't possibly imagine.

不要仅仅依赖课堂上学来的知识。拿出你们的恻隐之心、好奇心、对他人的同理心以及服务他人的决心。给予要大于所得。我向你们保证，你们将会有意想不到的回报。[1]grace /ɡreɪs/ vt. 为……增色[2]green apron：绿围裙，星巴克店面员工一般穿着绿色的围裙。[3]plight /plaɪt/ n. 苦难；困境[4]public housing：公租房，当时的美国公租房旨在消除城市贫民窟，安置城市贫困边缘群体。[5]Pampers：帮宝适，美国宝洁公司旗下的纸尿裤品牌[6]severance /ˈsevərəns/ n. 辞退，解雇[7]Affordable Care Act：《平价医疗法案》（ACA），由美国前总统奥巴马在2010年签署，也称“奥巴马医改”。该法案的核心内容是提高美国医保的覆盖率，降低医疗费用。[8]stock options：股票期权[9]cataclysmic /ˌkætəˈklɪzmɪk/ adj.（常用于名词前）有大变动的；灾难性的[10]galvanize /ˈɡælvənaɪz/ vt. 刺激，激励[11]unparalleled /ʌnˈpærəleld/ adj. 空前的；无与伦比的[12]亚利桑那州立大学2016、2017和2018年连续三年在U.S. News美国大学排名（U.S. News ＆ World Report Ranking）上获评“最具创新性大学”（Most Innovative）第一名。[13]walk in the shoes of ...：处于……的境地；设身处地

幸福生活的重要原则——海伦·米伦女爵在杜兰大学2017年毕业典礼上的演讲

海伦·米伦，1945年出生于英国伦敦，是英国老牌女演员，曾多次斩获世界性大奖。2003年，由于对英国影视事业做出的杰出贡献，她被伊丽莎白二世女王授予女爵士（Dame）爵位。2007年，海伦在电影《女王》（The Queen）中饰演英国女王伊丽莎白二世，并凭此角色获得了奥斯卡最佳女主角、威尼斯国际电影节最佳女主角、美国电影电视金球奖剧情类最佳女主角、英国电影学院奖最佳女主角等26项国际大奖。

海伦·米伦最初遵从其父母的意愿从事教师职业，但她的真正兴趣却是表演。为了追求心中的梦想，海伦加入了国立青年剧团，从舞台剧中的“埃及艳后”克里奥佩特拉一角开始了自己的演艺生涯。随后她加入了皇家莎士比亚剧团。海伦的电影事业始于1969年的《沙滩上的夏娃》（Age of Consent），而她具有突破性的电影是《漫长美好的星期五》（The Long Good Friday）。除舞台剧和电影外，海伦在电视剧中也频繁亮相，如《贝蒂姐妹》（Cousin Bette）、《头号嫌疑犯》（Prime Suspect）等。她还曾为多部影片配音，可以说是一位“全才演员”。

海伦·米伦于2005年在HBO历史电视剧《伊丽莎白一世》（Elizabeth I）中饰演英国女王伊丽莎白一世，2006年在电影《女王》中饰演伊丽莎白二世，又于2013年在舞台剧《女王召见》（The Audience）中再次饰演伊丽莎白二世，从而赢得了“女王专业户”这一名号。近年来，海伦·米伦因参演电影《爱在记忆消逝前》（The Leisure Seeker）、《天空之眼》（Eye in the Sky）以及客串《速度与激情8》（The Fate of the Furious）而为更多的中国观众所熟知。

2017年5月，海伦·米伦受邀在杜兰大学的毕业典礼上发表演讲。在演讲中，时年72岁的海伦·米伦为毕业生们提供了五条人生建议，她戏称之为“海伦·米伦关于快乐人生的五条法则”：别急着结婚；礼貌待人；无视那些潜伏在网络里评判他人外貌的“键盘侠”；直面恐惧；不要把事情搞复杂。她还呼吁毕业生多参与公益事业。海伦·米伦本人也是公益事业的先驱，她在多个公益项目中致力于为贫困学生提供援助，帮助受家暴侵害和贫穷困扰的女性和儿童；她还在海地、乌干达等欠发达国家和地区为当地的人们提供教育和健康、医疗援助。Speech演讲音频视频

Thank you. “My husband and I …” That's how the Queen speaks. All right, you probably don't know that. Well, it's a bit intimidating [1]following, especially following Corley. What a wonderful speech that was! I was very impressed with her words. And speaking as a much older person than she is, I can tell you: It's all true what she said; it's very, very accurate. President Fitts, members of the Board, faculty, [2][3]parents, friends, the brilliant Branford Marsalis, the indomitable [4][5][6]Diane Nash, the fascinating Shelley Taylor, RipTide the Pelican, and last but certainly never least, the great graduating Class of 2017—my greetings to you all.

And to all the graduates—and of course, as President mentioned, the families here, the moms and dads, brothers and sisters, grandparents, uncles, aunts, wives, husbands, and live-in lovers, not just hello, but congratulations to you! We salute you. And to the students: You did it! I mean, all those essays, all those classes, all those discussions and lectures, all those nights at the computer … and perhaps a greater test of endurance, all those nights at the Camellia Grill, and the Boot, and the F＆M and all those parties. And yet here you are. You finished the race. You made it through. Now you just have to listen to one more person talk—and I will do my best not to make it a lecture.

President Fitts, thank you for that lovely introduction. And I want to assure to you that President, you can relax—I've done my homework for today.

Because you know, whenever I take on a role, I do my research to truly understand the character I'm playing. So when I played a secret agent, a sniper, in Red, I learned how to fire a gun; and when I played the Queen, I learned how she talks, how she walks, and how she interacts with her advisers; and when I played a sadistic, horrible teacher in Teaching Mrs. Tingle, I went to observe some professors at LSU. Yes, they taught me everything.

And to prepare for today, I did my research on what people expect from a commencement speaker. You know, there are hundreds of tips out there—but just three really big ones.

First—Keep it short. No one wants to hear a 30-minute speech. So, that's it. I'm done. See you at the bar. I'll have a vodka martini [7]straight up with a wedge of lime, thank you. The lime is because you know, I'm a bit of a health fanatic.

The second point about commencements speeches is: talk about your journey and connect it to everything you have in common with your audience. So, today's speech will contain advice for any of you born in England who decide to become Shakespearean actresses, and end up doing nude scenes in 10 films. I just mentioned that just to see if any of your fathers, you know, are getting out their cellphones right now to Google me. Dads, stop it. Inappropriate. Put it away. I mean the phone!

And number three. Everyone advises a commencement speaker to say the one thing that the students will remember 40 years from now. Now that was very difficult—I just thought and thought and thought about this. It took me weeks to come up with it. And then it [8]came to me, in the small hours of the morning, something I believe that you will remember in the year 2057 because it is so true. Here it [9][10]is. Get ready: Whether you're in Tipitina's, the French Quarter or [11]the Oval Office, no good can ever come from tweeting at 3 a.m.

Now speaking of 3 a.m., it's so great to be back in this incredible city where I never seem to get to bed before 3 a.m.

Spending the past few days reacquainting myself with New Orleans, going to dinner, walking around your campus, I just have one question: Why the hell are you graduating? I mean, what possible reason is there to leave here and go find jobs? I mean it makes no

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