作者：(英)托马斯·坎皮恩
出版社：上海译文出版社
格式: AZW3, DOCX, EPUB, MOBI, PDF, TXT
跟住你美丽的太阳——英语爱情诗选试读：
谈“兼顾顿数、字数、韵式”的译诗要求（代前言）
我的英诗汉译对照本中，这是第十多本了。对照本常被视为普及读物，但我很喜欢。因为译诗容易失真或变形，若没有原作对照，可能弄得离原作很远，对照本则不是译者的“一面之词”，便于读者比较和监督。再说，如今的英语学习盛况空前，很多对翻译感兴趣的读者已不满足于看看译文，有的还乐于重译一些小诗却无暇寻找原作，对于这些读者，英汉对照的原作和译诗就提供了一种基础和方便。
另一方面，拙译与多数译诗不同，既要求准确反映原作内容，也要求较准确反映格律。因为各种文体中，格律是诗歌特有的显著标志，有规律，却千变万化，有审美价值，还蕴含信息。因此译格律诗就应当反映原作格律，并尽量准确。又因汉语一音一字，这样的译诗在书面上可能显得规整或有某种几何图形。但这不是为形式而形式，而是这种翻译的自然结果。这一点，英汉对照将是有力的证明。
这种译诗要求虽然合理而可行，出现却较晚，且迄今为止似乎只有我在这样译，在大量不反映原作格律的译诗中显得孤立又“另类”。我写了些文章，甚至一本《英诗汉译学》666该书2007年由上海外语教育出版社推出，2009年获中国大学出版社图书奖首届优秀学术著作奖一等奖。777，介绍这种译诗要求，也论及它是英诗汉译发展的必然。但英诗汉译的历史虽不长，有关论述却不少，我人微言轻，这点东西未必能引起注意，所以常在自己译诗集的前言或后记中作些说明，因为读者有可能第一次接触我这种译诗。一
这里举几首按此种要求翻译的短诗666本节中的4首原作出自The Norton Book of Light Verse（1986），依次在该书的208、86、88、289页。777，先看美国诗人Lanston Hughes（1902—1967）的短诗Little Lyric（of Great Importance）和拙译：
I wish the rent 我但愿/房租
Was Heaven sent 老天/替我出。
原作每行4音节，行尾押韵，行中第2、第4音节有自然重音，形成轻-重/轻-重两个节奏单位（即两个抑扬格音步），是很严谨的格律诗。这等长的两行诗，有点像对联，不该译得长短不一。当然也可译成“我愿房租/老天来付”，让译诗字数等于原作音节数。但如果以此作为译诗要求，常会发生困难，因为按一对一的比例，往往很难容纳原作的全部意思。请看佚名作者的作品To a Living Author和拙译：Your comedy I've read，my friend，老兄，我读了你那本喜剧，And like the half you pilfer'd best；对那剽窃的半部很喜欢；But sure the piece you yet may mend：当然，整体上有改进余地——Take courage，man！and steal the rest. 要敢作敢为！再偷另一半。
此诗原作每行8音节，构成4个抑扬格音步，在押韵上则是第1、3行和第2、4行分别押（即韵式为abab）。原作中几乎每行都有两音节甚至三音节的词，但要译成每行8字较困难。而大量实践证明，这种诗行若译成10字4顿（或称4拍）就较有回旋余地，有利于译诗流畅，既便于安排常有的三字或四字顿，也避免因都是两字顿而引起的呆板之感。
从上面例子可看出，这种译诗要求包括四方面：1）译诗行数等于原作行数，2）反映原作韵式，3）译诗行顿数（或称拍数）与原作行音步数相等，4）译诗行字数与原作行音节数相应。而正是凭这四个方面，可确定诗的格律框架。
行数是诗歌形式的要素，但要译诗行数与原作行数一致并不困难。相比之下，诗行音节数没那么重要，要与原作音节数相应却不太容易，但这样做自有其意义。因为音步数严整有序的格律诗中，音节数有讲究与不讲究的，前者的音节数同样严整有序，后者则听其自然。而这样的差别在一定程度上反映作品的时代性或种类，也可反映作者的格律观或对某首诗的特殊处理。请看英国作家Max Beerbohm（1872—1956）的Thomas Hardy and A. F. Housman666 Thomas Hardy和A. F. Housman是英国的著名作家和诗人，他们的作品都有悲观主义色彩，代表作分别是《德伯家的苔丝》和《西罗普郡的少年》。777：How compare either of this grim twain？ 拿什么来比这一对悲情者？Each has an equal knack， 他俩有相同的癖好；Hardy prefers the pill that's blue， 但哈代喜欢吞蓝色药丸，Housman the draught that's black. 豪斯曼爱喝黑的药。
这诗属“谣曲体”，四行诗为4音步行与3音步行相间，双行押韵。但音节数不严整，第一行不是8音节，因为第一音步含轻-轻-重三个音节（第二音步也“出格”）。这情况在早期诗人的非谣曲体创作中很少见，可以说，Beerbohm这位现代诗人有意选用了这种诗体。所以译文第一行的4顿可比其他规整的4顿多出一字以示区别。
这原作只有一行诗的音节数“出格”，有些现代格律诗的音节数可能行行“出格”，且“出格”幅度可能较大。所以，翻译这种不计较音节数的格律诗，也只需要反映原作的韵式和诗行音步数，字数可听其自然。当然，这样的译诗中诗行字数会显得杂乱。
由于迄今的译诗大多是自由诗形式，创作诗中格律诗也不多，读者可能不熟悉这种字数不严整的格律诗，将其混同于“自由化”译诗。考虑到排印上整齐有序的译诗不仅娱人眼目，还可提示格律，因此有时也不妨对这种译诗讲究一下字数（如将上例第一行改为10字的“拿什么来比这对悲情者”），以突出其格律。请再看美国作者Mark Hollis（1908— ）的一首Careless Talk：Bill 比尔Was ill. 生病了，In his delirium 说了些胡话，He talked about Miriam. 胡话中讲到了米丽玛。This was an error 这是个错误，As his wife was a terror 因为他老婆是雌老虎，Known 芳名As Joan. 叫琼英。
在有的版本中，这首诗的首行排成了Bill was ill，末行排成了Known as Joan，文字上虽无出入，但趣味少了一点。可见，合适的诗行排列形式有助于增强诗意和提高表现力，何不利用呢？二
从上面四首短诗可以想象，凭诗节的行数和韵式、诗行的音步数和音节数，可组合出多少不同格律，而“兼顾”译法则可能把千变万化的格律反映出来。当然，原作中相同的格律，译诗中同样能如实反映。请看Williamina Parrish（1880—1940）的这首The Name和拙译：I've learned to say it carelessly， 我学会说它时漫不经心，So no one else can see 不流露一点点声色；By any little look or sign 让别人怎么也难以发现How dear it is to me. 它对我有多么亲切。But，oh，the thrill，as though you kissed 但像你吻我颤栗的指尖，My tingling finger-tip 哦，那猛一阵奋激——Each time the golden syllables 每当那几个黄金般音节Fall lightly from my lips. 轻轻地发自我嘴里。
两节原作的格律相同，与上面第三例也基本相同，三节译文则反映出这种格律的一致性。当然，准确反映原作内容已非易事，加上“兼顾”要求后更受拘束，难免增加困难。但这种译诗要求虽然看似严格，却仍有修改余地。例如上面第二例可改成：你那本喜剧我读了，朋友，那剽窃来的半部很精彩；当然，整体上还可以补救——勇敢点，另一半也去偷来。也可以改成：朋友，我读了你那本喜剧，那剽窃来的半部挺不错；但老兄，这事改好也容易——胆子大些，另一半别放过！
两种译文在诗行顿数、字数和韵式上都与前面译文一样，内容也一致，但文字上差别明显。这说明，即使“兼顾诗行顿数、字数、韵式”，译诗仍有回旋和改动余地，把译诗改到满意或差强人意为止。
当然，翻译有些诗的时候可能左支右绌，无法“兼顾”，那就在字数上（例如The Name第六行，但这里考虑了字数），或韵式上，甚至在诗行顿数上变通一下。但任何情况下也不该完全放弃格律，特别是不经尝试就放弃，毕竟这是格律诗的基本特征！对我来说，与其放弃一首译诗的格律，还不如干脆放弃那首诗，因为能够用“兼顾”要求译出的原作多得译不完，何必一定要译它呢？
所以在反映原作格律上，本书中的译诗基本上要求都较“严”。因为这译法是我提出的，反映了我的译诗观和译诗特点，自己应当做到。
但我并不反对译者在必要时重起炉灶，为译诗重铸新律。但这样做应当慎重并有充分补偿，因为与原作内容相配的是原作格律，所以在译诗的所有可能形式中，与准确反映原作内容的译文最为相配的，应当是准确反映原作格律的形式。再说，这样做将丧失原作格律中的全部信息，至少对这译诗来讲，它在格律体系中已不在原作的那个位置上了。三
较准确地反映原作格律，就能明确地区分出格律异同，译诗就能显示原作的格律特点和蕴含的信息，也可以像原作那样，凭格律将诗歌分门别类，显示出其中的关联和整体上的井然秩序。对于一些格律上比较有特色的作品，译诗也可以像原作中那样，只要提出其格律，就能从众多的译诗中方便地找到。再说，如今的翻译常谈到文化，那么格律传统是诗歌文化吗？应当不应当反映呢？
这些问题的提出就像“兼顾”译法的出现一样，都是译诗发展的结果。当然，“兼顾”的译诗也在发展，从最早的生疏到比较熟练，从最早的不够自然到比较流畅，这说明在“兼顾”条件下，译诗的总体要求可以进一步提高，译诗质量也可以通过修改逐步改进。本书中的译诗（篇幅都在18行以上）大多经过修改，或者不止改过一遍。但译诗本就是一种勉为其难的事，再怎么改，总还有很多遗憾，而根据我的客观状况，我只能改到这里为止了。
最后要感谢译文出版社和责编张建平同志给予的支持，让我有充裕的准备时间，并让本书同肯定没有经济效益的拙著《译诗的演进》一同出版。还要谢谢女儿黄海，她在准备大搬家的忙碌中，仍给了我很多帮助。黄杲炘2010年12月
Thomas Wyatt（1503—1542）
The Lover's Appeal
And wilt thou leave me thus？Say nay！say nay！for shame！To save thee from the blameOf all my grief and grame.And wilt thou leave me thus？Say nay！say nay！And wilt thou leave me thus？That hath loved thee so longIn wealth and woe among？And is thy heart so strongAs for to leave me thus？Say nay！say nay！And wilt thou leave me thus？That hath given thee my heartNever for to departNeither for pain nor smart？And wilt thou leave me thus？Say nay！say nay！And wilt thou leave me thus？And have no more pityOf him that loveth thee？Alas！thy cruelty！And wilt thou leave me thus？Say nay！say nay！The Lover Rejoiceth That He Has Broken the Snare of Love
Tangled was I in Love's snare，Oppressed with pain，torment with care；Of grief right sure，of joy quite bare，Clean in despair by cruelty.But ha！ha！ha！full well is me，For I am now at liberty.The woeful days so full of pain，The weary nights all spent in vain，The labour lost for so small gain，To write them all it will not be.But ha！ha！ha！full well is me，For I am now at liberty.With feignèd words which were but windTo long delays was I assigned；Her wily looks my wits did blind；Whate'er she would I would agree.But ha！ha！ha！full well is me，For I am now at liberty.Was never bird tangled in limeThat broke away in better time，Than I，that rotten boughs did climbAnd had no hurt but 'scapèd free.Now ha！ha！ha！full well is me，For I am now at liberty.What Meaneth This
What meaneth this？When I lie alone，I toss，I turn，I sigh，I groan；My bed me seems as hard as stone：What means this？I sigh，I plain continually；The clothes that on my bed do lieAlways methinks they lie awry：What means this？In slumbers oft for fear I quake；For heat and cold I burn and shake；For lack of sleep my head doth ache：What means this？A-mornings then when I do riseI turn unto my wonted guise；All day after muse and deviseWhat means this？And if perchance by me there passShe unto whom I sue for grace，The cold blood forsaketh my face：What means this？But if I sit near her by，With loud voice my heart doth cry，And yet my mouth is dumb and dry；What means this？To ask for help no heart I have，My tongue doth fail what I should crave，Yet inwardly I rage and rave：What means this？Thus have I passed many a yearAnd many a day，tho naught appear；But most of that that I most fear：What means this？Henry Howard（1517—1547）
‘When Raging Love with Extreme Pain’
When raging love with extreme painMost cruelly distrains my heart，When that my tears，as floods of rain，Bear witness of my woeful smart，When sighs have wasted so my breathThat I lie at the point of death：I call to mind the navy greatThat the Greeks brought to Troye town，And how the boisterous winds did beatTheir ships，and rent their sails adown，Till Agamemnon's daughter's bloodAppeased the gods that them withstood：And how that in those ten years' warFull many a bloody deed was done，And many a lord that came full farThere caught his bane，alas，too soon，And many a good knight overrun，Before the Greeks had Helen won.Then think I thus：‘sith such repair，So long time war of valiant men，Was all to win a lady fair，Shall I not learn to suffer then？And to think my life well spent to beServing a worthier wight than she？’Therefore I never shall repent，But pains，contented，still endure；For like as when，rough winter spent，The pleasant spring straight draweth in ure；So，after raging storms of care，Joyful at length may be my fare.Queen Elizabeth I（1533—1603）
When I Was Fair
When I was fair and young and favour gracèd me，Of many was I sought，their mistress for to be：But I did scorn them all，and answered them therefore，‘Go，go，go，seek some other where：Importune me no more.’How many weeping eyes I made to pine with woe，How many sighing hearts，I have no skill to show：Yet I the prouder grew，and answered them therefore，‘Go，go，go，seek some other where：Importune me no more.’Then spake fair Venus' son，that proud victorious boy，And said，‘Fine Dame，since that you be so coy，I will so pluck your plumes that you shall say no more，“Go，go，go，seek some other where：Importune me no more.”’When he had spake these words，such change grew in my breastThat neither night nor day，since that，I could take any rest：Then lo，I did repent that I had said before，‘Go，go，go，seek some other where：Importune me no more.’Thomas Campion（1567—1620）
‘Follow Thy Fair Sun，Unhappy Shadow’
Follow thy fair sun，unhappy shadow，Though thou be black as night，And she made all of light，Yet follow thy fair sun，unhappy shadow.Follow her whose light thy light depriveth，Though here thou liv'st disgraced，And she in heaven is placed，Yet follow her whose light the world reviveth.Follow those pure beams whose beauty burneth，That so have scorched thee，As thou still black must be，Till her kind beams thy black to brightness turneth.Follow her while yet her glory shineth：There comes a luckless night，That will dim all her light；And this the black unhappy shade divineth.Follow still since so thy fates ordained，The sun must have his shade，Till both at once do fade，The sun still proud，the shadow still disdained.Henry Wotton（1568—1639）
Elizabeth of Bohemia
You meaner beauties of the night，That poorly satisfy our eyesMore by your number than your light，You common people of the skies；What are you when the moon shall rise？You curious chanters of the wood，That warble forth Dame Nature's lays，Thinking your passions understoodBy your weak accents；what's your praiseWhen Philomel her voice shall raise？You violets that first appear，By your pure purple mantles knownLike the proud virgins of the year，As if the spring were all your own；What are you when the rose is blown？So，when my mistress shall be seenIn form and beauty of her mind，By virtue first，then choice，a Queen，Tell me，if she were not designedTh' eclipse and glory of her kind？Robert Ayton（1570—1638）
Inconstancy Reproved
I do confess thou'rt smooth and fair，And I might have gone near to love thee，Had I not found the slightest prayerThat lips could move，had power to move thee；But I can let thee now aloneAs worthy to be loved by none.I do confess thou'rt sweet；yet findThee such an unthrift of thy sweets，Thy favours are but like the windThat kisseth everything it meets：And since thou canst with more than one，Thou'rt worthy to be kissed by none.The morning rose that untouched standsArmed with her briers，how sweet she smells！But plucked and strained through ruder hands，Her sweets no longer with her dwells：But scent and beauty both are gone，And leaves fall from her，one by one.Such fate ere long will thee betideWhen thou hast handled been awhile，With sere flowers to be thrown aside；And I shall sigh，while some will smile，To see thy love to every oneHath brought thee to be loved by none.John Donne（1572—1631）
The Funeral
Whoever comes to shroud me，do not harmNor question muchThat subtle wreath of hair which crowns mine arm；The mystery，the sign you must not touch，For'tis my outward soul，Viceroy to that，which then to heaven being gone，Will leave this to control；And keep these limbs，her provinces，from dissolution.For if the sinewy thread my brain lets fallThrough every part，Can tie those parts，and make me one of all；These hairs which upward grew，and strength and artHave from a better brainCan better do'it；except she meant that IBy this should know my pain，As prisoners then are manacled，when they are condemned to die.Whate'er she meant by'it，bury it with me，For since I amLove's martyr，it might breed idolatry，If into others' hands these relics came；As 'twas humilityTo'afford to it all that a soul can do，So，'tis some bravery，That since you would save none of me，I bury some of you.The Sun Rising
Busy old fool，unruly Sun，Why dost thou thus，Through windows，and through curtains call on us？Must to thy motions lovers' seasons run？Saucy pedantic wretch，go chideLate school-boys，and sour 'prentices，Go tell court-huntsmen that the King will ride，Call country ants to harvest offices；Love，all alike，no season knows nor clime，Nor hours，days，months，which are the rags of time.Thy beams，so reverend，and strongWhy shouldst thou think？I could eclipse and cloud them with a wink，But that I would not lose her sight so long：If her eyes have not blinded thine，Look，and tomorrow late，tell me，Whether both the Indias of spice and mineBe where thou left'st them，or lie here with me.Ask for those kings whom thou saw'st yesterday，And thou shalt hear，‘All here in one bed lay.’She is all states，and all Princes，I；Nothing else is.Princes do but play us；compar'd to this，All honour's mimic；all wealth alchemy，Thou Sun art half as happy as we，In that the world's contracted thus；Thine age asks ease，and since thy duties beTo warm the world，that's done in warming us.Shine here to us，and thou art every where；This bed thy centre is，these walls，thy sphere.Lover's Infiniteness
If yet I have not all thy love，Dear，I shall never have it all，I cannot breathe one other sigh，to move，Nor can entreat one other tear to fall，And all my treasure，which should purchase thee，Sighs，tears，and oaths，and letters I have spent.Yet no more can be due to me，Than at the bargain made was meant，If then thy gift of love were partial，That some to me，some should to others fall，Dear，I shall never have thee all.Or if then thou gavest me all，All was but all which thou hadst then；But if in thy heart，since，there be or shall，New love created be，by other men，Which have their stocks entire，and can in tears，In sighs，in oaths，and letters outbid me，This new love may beget new fears，For this love was not vow'd by thee.And yet it was，thy gift being general，The ground，thy heart，is mine；whatever shallGrow there，dear，I should have it all.Yet I would not have all yet：He that hath all can have no more，And since my love doth every day admitNew growth，thou shouldst have new rewards in store；Thou canst not every day give me thy heart，If thou canst give it，then thou never gav'st it：Love's riddles are，that though thy heart depart，It stays at home，and thou with losing sav'st it：But we will have a way more liberal，Than changing hearts，to join them，so we shallBe one，and one another's all.试读结束[说明：试读内容隐藏了图片]